It's always astounded me how willing some in the gay activist community are to celebrate someone surgically altering their body to "become" who they perceive to be internally. Yet when I determine I want to reorient my sexual orientation, which does not require drastic surgery or body altering drugs, according to those same activists, I am the one doing damage to myself and others by simply holding to a particular worldview that brings me contentment and sexual reorientation. The transgendered are applauded for radically altering their bodies while I am scolded for holding the belief that I would be happier living out who I truly am regardless of my past life as a gay identified man. It’s ok for someone to ignore what they were obviously born as but for people like me … we are told being “gay” is genetic and should be embraced because we have no other option.
Gay activists, who truly don’t represent most who would identify as “gay,” celebrate someone discovering their true identity … well unless it involves spiritual or moral reasons that are contrary to gay fundamentalism. Their moral opposition to my reality is the difference here. For the most part, the transgender person does not call into question the morality of gay activist sexuality and identity in the context of a biblical sexual ethic. My existence, just by being around and talking about it, does challenge those issues. Therefore, since most "transfolk" as others have called them, tow the gay fundamentalist line… they are celebrated as "the new gay."
However, for those of us who want to pursue loving, whole, satisfying, passionate, congruent with our faith, opposite sex relationships instead of pursuing same sex sexual activity … somehow we are the ones deserving of mockery and condescending judgment.
Not only the transgendered but people who drop their whole lives; family, friends and faith to enter into the GLBTQ fold are held up as examples of being true to self and deserving of unconditional love and acceptance. Apparently if you are willing to drastically alter your life to enter the GLB"T"Q fold … that's ok but like the old song Hotel California by the Eagles, once you are in that fold, "… you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."
My life has drastically changed. I am (and am becoming) who I was always intended to be but I have a sneaking suspicion that there wouldn't be to many people thrilled with the idea of "GLBTQEx"
(not that I would want that … just sayin')
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
Good post, Randy.
Thank you Mike.
you’re not supposed to touch the transgender third rail!!! Shame on you.
Did you see the Newsweek article this month?
Well, I for one would welcome you as part of a GLBT”X”, as long as the X isn’t telling the other letters that they need to move their position in the alphabet (and conversely, the GLBTs shouldn’t be telling the X that they should move).
Ultimately, the alphabet soup really should represent all of humanity, and so an X (or H, for “hetero”?) would work quite nicely.
Both common sense and thought provoking – many thanks!
Has anybody bothered asking Intersexed people and Transsexuals whether they want to be in the Great GLBITTQQ Alliance?
That’s Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Intersexed, Transsexual, Transgendered, Questioning, Queer?
Why should people who have medical problems with their bodies be lumped in with those of nonstandard sexual orientation? Why not add in those with cleft palates, and Native Americans too?
And now we’ve been co-opted by yet another group to make a political point. Tell me, when was the last time you did anything to help Intersexed people? Or even thought of their existence?
Zoe, I don’t see Randy lumping Intersexed people in with gay and trans people. I wouldn’t either–I agree that it’s not anything like homosexuality or gender confusion of a psychological nature.
What’s frustrating about it for me is that most of the places this issue comes up, it’s usually hijacked by advocates for cross-dressing and gender-reassignment for people who have a definite physical gender–as if the existence of genuinely Intersexed people proves that transgenderism is healthy and normal.
If you don’t see folks like Randy trying to “help” Intersexed people quite yet, it might be because he understands it’s a completely separate issue.
For me, I’m in the stage of learning what it’s really all about, and what people’s experiences are. I recently started to dialog with an Intersexed Christian via MySpace, so I’m trying to learn before I form a solid opinion.
I just want to say your artical dose bring up a very good point. I am my self in the group of wich you speak how ever I totaly obstain from identifying with the GLBTQ. Many of us do. For the simple reason that they do not acuritly represent our interests. The reaon Trans have fallen in with this crowed is because of a few. Those people who wish to stand out in the crowed and challange any who think differently. Most of us are not so confrontational. We simply wish to sort out who we are and live the rest of our lives that way in amongst the masses. It’s not mine or any of my friends intention to draw attention to our selvs. We are not any differnet in some respects from any one else. Nor do I think I am. It is a shame also that people like your self are targed for returning to who you were. It shouldn’t be that way. Realining ones perceptions is a constant part of the ebb and flow of life. The GLBTQ has becoem as obnoxious and anyoing as the ACLU. I say ignore em all and eventualy they will all go away. How ever calling light to the injustices cometed upon people whose ideas very from the majority is necessary. No one should suffer for their views and opinions right or wrong.
Hmm, that’s weird. I’m transgender and many Christians I meet tell me, “Obviously God created you x because you born that way. You have to accept God’s creation – you have to accept your biological destiny.”
I won’t pretend to know how LGBT people treat you as ex-gay (or whatever you preferred to be called) so please don’t do the same to me. LGB people and any other liberals don’t celebrate me. They don’t treat me as the new gay, unless the new gay means stereotyping, discriminating, pathologizing me, and calling me a pervert.