Mr. Clean War - Part II — ETC: Everyday Thoughts Collected

Earlier I posted about the bad experience I had with a trainer at the new gym. I will now refer to him as Mr. Clean instead of The Angry Trainer because he looks just like Mr. Clean .. except for the white eyebrows…and he wasn’t angry today.

So, as I have been getting acclimated to the gym, I have been avoiding Mr. Clean. It’s been pretty easy because there is like a million, maybe two million people at this gym. I don’t have time for “All My Trainers” drama.
However, as chance would have it, I completely had to talk to him and be nice even. Here is how it all started.

I was doing one of the abs machines (crunches). The machine next to me was also abs but it was one that twists your upper torso to get at those love handles. Well, the poor man on the thing was obviously a new newbie, not like me … a lapsed Mr. Olympia. He clearly did not know that you are only supposed to work one side at a time. This guy was going all Maytag on the machine at like… 900 mph. He was killing himself and smashing the plates every time he over extended.

He sounded like one of those awful pile driving machine crane things that drive concrete bridge pillars down into the inner bowels of earth. BAM BAM BAM BAM!!!!

… and he did NOT even care.

The commotion was noteworthy, every one around turned and Mr. Clean came running over to help the man out. Some of the other trainers were laughing. And just a note, if you are a trainer … don’t ever laugh at someone who doesn’t know what they are doing. Others are watching and they will not hire you … you unprofessional little weasels.

… I know, I should probably repent.

I was impressed that Mr. Clean handled the situation with grace and took the time to explain the exercise and the machine to the man who was very embarrassed once he realized his mistake.

I wasn’t even looking, I was crunching away … la ti dah… don’t look at me Mr. Clean who is now only three feet away … DOH! here he comes. He started talking and all I heard was Evanescence. That’s because I had my iPod going. I took the earbuds out and he repeated, “How are you doing? Getting to know the place?” I told him yes as I struck a crouching tiger hidden dragon pose waiting for his attack …

… ok I didn’t really do that anywhere except in my mind. In reality I was standing there with a horribly mismatched t-shirt gym shorts combo nervously shifting my feet and praying the man didn’t beat me to death.

Then he said, “so have you thought any more about what we discussed?” I said, “Yes and I honestly cannot commit to that kind of a financial agreement right now.” To my surprise he was like, “I completely understand … so what are you working on today?” I told him abs (presses) and shoulders. He gave me some truly helpful tips and I shared with him some things my friend and trainer Chris had taught me and he agreed that I had a good plan. He then shared that he had torn up his shoulder a little over a week ago and has been having problems with it. We then just chatted for a couple of minutes about possible pinched nerves and torn muscle stuff.

… I pretty much just nodded and said I hoped he gets better soon and encouraged him to see a doctor. Mr. Clean doesn’t like doctors.

Mr. Clean was nice. … go figure. I must have just caught him on a bad day when we first met. I am so glad I don’t have to avoid him anymore.

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