The Hulk Has A Bad Body Image and I Think He Might Sell Drugs
As regular readers and friends know, I have been shopping for a new gym this year. I worked out regularly for five years up until last summer. I fell off the exercise wagon for a myriad of reasons and grew very dissatisfied with my old gym.
I won’t bore you with all the details but suffice it to say that quite a number of things stole away my time and motivation. Add in the fact that I wanted to eat … a lot, and … I did. It was really good food too. But, sadly, fat Randy returned.
However, the past six weeks I have been really, and honestly, enjoying digging in and upping my workout. Five days a week for the past six weeks and counting :). It has gotten to be as serious a workout as I was doing before I fell off the gym radar last summer. I feel GREAT. I am losing weight but not nearly as fast as before. Partly because I know I am building more muscle and while I am making healthier choices, I refuse to do those evil legalistic diets. So far I am just shy of 20 lbs lighter than I was six weeks ago but I am honestly not using the scales as the main focus of my motivation or inspiration.
woot.
I love my new gym. It’s a true neighborhood gym. Old, young, fat, skinny, Olympian, high schoolers, retirees, quite a few of my church friends and we even have a man who could totally pass as one of the ZZ Top guys. He *owns* the hanging ab crunch contraption thing.
I have only gotten in a spat with one of the trainers so far. He asked me FIVE times if I wanted to take my workout to “the next level.” I wasn’t mean but I was very straightforward with, “do NOT ask me again” on the fourth and fifth attempts.
He got the message … finally.
But, there is this one guy who is about 5′4″ and nothing but muscle. He talks really loud… all the time. I am going to call him The Hulk even though he is not green … yet. He has a million people coming up to him talking about “supplements” and food experiments with ingredients that have more syllables than a medical dictionary and just sound painful to say.
You should know by now that I am a totally unabashed eaves-dropper. Not for gossip … just to be entertained. The Hulk makes it easy because you can hear him over just about everything. Ok… I am not that bad of an eavesdropper, especially with topics and words I don’t understand or are bored with. However, his repeatedly saying LOUDLY that such and such something has a bad reputation only because people don’t know how to take it, and he will “hook them up with the right stuff” … sends up red flags for me. It leads me to wonder if I am working out with undercover DEA agents around recording his supplement sermons.
That and the fact he is always bouncing around loading EVERY single 45 lbs plate he can onto all the free weight contraptions. He seriously loads the modern miracles of torture … er … I mean exercise … to the max weight that they are designed to hold. I am not exaggerating. He draws a crowd and then throws those weights around like they are toys. Interestingly, he never does cardio.
Why? Why the show? Why no cardio? is this really healthy? I always worry that when he exhales in mid rep that some bone is going to snap out somewhere.
The thing is … he doesn’t really look like those muscle heads they show on TV. He’s just a short human tank with a do-rag. This would indicate, to me, that he is more about the power/strength, and bald, than being the next Mr. Olympian. He also likes trash talk with his workout partners. I just don’t get it and I worry for those young guys who think he is awesome. I haven’t done any research on men who have a body image “issues” but I am thinking this is a possible manifestation of it.
I personally am getting a kick out of bench pressing more than I was before. But I seriously have no desire to try out milkshakes that involve three different forms of chalk that the FDA probably finds questionable.
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